Looks like Jessica Simpson may be off the market. Looks like she was getting very cozy with Dane Cook, the co-star of her new movie “Employee of the Month”, at a club.

 “Jessica and Dane were seen getting close at exclusive nightspot Hyde, and according to witnesses neither could “couldn’t hide their feelings”.[FEMALE FIRST]

I guess being the biggest comedian in the world will come with some perks. For those of you who don’t know who he is go visit his site at DaneCook.com. Those two would make one hell of a Newlyweds the Return on MTV!

Well if you were in denial and waiting for the latest installment of the Newleyweds it’s time to face the glaring reality.  Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey have officially ended their marriage.  They were married for 3 years – which in Hollywood is like 50 years for you and me.  I was so hopeful that all of their recent dating and sleeping around was just a cry for help. 

I wonder how Joe Simpson is feeling about not having Jess sign that pre-nup??  Great job dad — solid — way to possibly cost your biggest client/daughter $15 million!!

Not that we haven’t seen her naked in numerous publications and some very well known videos, but when she takes off her clothes people still have to look.

“Pamela Anderson stripped off almost completely naked in a shop window last night as part of an antiView the profile for Jennifer Lopez on Celebrity Spotlight-fur protest.”[LSE]

I am all for peaceful protests and nothing says peaceful like large fake tatas. I mean who will drop a bomb or riot when you are looking at three practically naked women in a store window — I MEAN THEY ARE NAKED! What was I talking about again???

After baby Brangelina scored over $4 million for her pictures baby TomKat decided to throw her hat into the mix. However results weren’t as favorable.

“A photo shoot of Suri was evidently offered to Wire Image for sale to celeb mags, including People, US Weekly, Star and In Touch Weekly. But the reported near $3 million bid the pics fetched was a slap in the face for mom and pop, and they pulled out.”[COURIER]

The only theory I have behind this $1 million dollar slap in the face is people think Tom Cruise is crazy and that any association with his off spring will make them crazy also. Plus the baby has a tattoo on her forehead advertising Dainetics – that’s just creepy.

How thin is too thin? At what point do you just eat a cookie or something? That is the questions being asked after Nicole Richie and Mischa Barton were seen at a Malibu beach. Rumor has it Sally Struthers will star a feed the celebrities campaign. You throw some flies buzzing around their head and you might get some donations. For the cost of a cup of a day you can help Nicole and Mischa get the important nutrition they so desperately need.

The insulting $3 million offer for exclusive pictures of baby Suri is not the reason that TomKat will not be releasing them.  The new claim is that his religion frowns on showing off pictures of babies.

It has now been claimed Tom is reluctant to show off Suri because Scientology doctrine teaches followers of the sci-fi cult to avoid taking newborn babies out unless absolutely necessary.

Everyone knows that a picture is where the souls is and if you want to protect your soul you can never show your picture. That is why I refuse to get a driver’s license — that right you lose a piece of you soul every time you get carded in a bar. Wait that could be from the Tequila, but why chance it I saw the should thing in a movie once so I believe it!

I can see the baby and it looked at me!!